Hello family, Let's play a game with this email. It's called "Let's see how many funny stories of my district I can fit into an email with 25 minutes and thirty seconds to write and also make you think that I'm learning something here" (which i am). I guess that's basically the game I play every week. My life is just ridiculous so I could pull a story out of anything. Well, tomorrow makes four weeks that I've been at the MTC. That's a whole month! That means I only have 17 months left of my mission! I'm almost coming home! Well, not really, but I do feel like that month has just flown by so I'm sure the next 17 will too. It kinda makes me sad that I'm coming home so soon, but that's really ridiculous. I just realized, as a bunch of elders walked into this computer lab, that I'm wearing the headphones that were sitting by this computer. They are huge and look ridiculous and there is no reason why I would be wearing them. I'm gong to take them off now. So this week, we were learning about commands and we were practicing in class how to do them. Good old Elder Keeling (the one who's very serious and likes to stay on task all the time) kept saying to Elder Shawhan "No tocame" after he would touch him, but he was actually saying it wrong. He was trying to say "don't touch me" but what he actually said was "No, touch me." We all thought that was really funny, especially when Elder Shawhan kept touching him and Elder Keeling kept repeating "no, touch me!" until someone finally told him what was right. We've all been saying that this week when someone bumps us or touches us and we get a real kick out of it. Our teacher, Hermana Jesperson, says that we have the most inside jokes out of any district she's ever met. I would take that as a compliment. Elder Spencer, another ridiculous elder in my district who always calls himself a pelotador ( "baller" - but he totally made it up) told us a freaky joke this week. What do you get when a cow tries to jump over a barbed wire fence? Udder destruction! I thought it was a terrible joke, but still kinda funny. Later that night, we were watching Legacy (which by the way is a ridiculous movie with the acting and just weird things that happen so basically the whole MTC was cracking up while watching it) and the little girl was reading her BOM next to a cow that she was supposed to be milking and all anyone in our district could think about was "udder destruction" so we all cracked up. Thanks so much for the packages this week, Mom! I actually got three packages from you, which is a pretty impressive number. And you sent everything that i asked for. My teacher thought the "get lucky in the RC" pin was so hilarious that he pinned it to our board. And I shared the Carmel Delites with my district (who think they're called Samoas - silly district) and they absolutely loved them. Elder Shawhan also got the package you sent him and the letter that Kylie sent him. I felt slightly ridiculous that two people responded to my request for letters for him, but I think he was happy to get them. He was thrilled when Elder Miller handed him the little yellow slip that meant he got a package and he ran all the way to the mailroom, singing "I've got the golden ticket." It was pretty funny when he got back to class to tell me that the package was from my mom." I wasn't totally shocked though - you're the best, Mom. He shared the cookies with all of us. Also, this week, we've been arguing with Elder Miller about how there is really no such thing as Karma because he's always saying that I'm going to have bad karma because I don't finish my food at any meal and I waste it. I tried to tell him that I don't believe in Karma. Then H. Crosby said that her grandma is named Carma and she went on to say," Yo se que Carma vive." It was really funny. That was on our day of English fast so we were really excited that we were funny in Spanish and we all high fived. What a victory! We played a game this week with Hermano Quintana and after we were done, we were talking about different games we could play that would help us learn. Elder Keeling told us about a game that he likes to play where everyone tries not to smile or laugh. I said that i would be terrible at the game because I can't ever stop smiling or laughing and he got a completely serious face and said," All you have to do is think about dead puppies and you can win." It was one of the most ridiculous things I have ever seen someone say and we all died laughing and of course, we have been repeating it all week. Do you remember when I told you that H. LaPray likes to call me Herman? Well, I told the elders about that too and now Elder Shawhan always calls us Hermans and also things like Herm Seeg, Herm Ting, Herm Lap, and Herm Cros. It cracks me up every time. This next week we're going to start teaching in Spanish and we are a little concerned, but really excited. We're also going to speak completely in Spanish on Wednesday and Friday. MTC choir is going great. I always sit by Hermana Tingey because we both sing altos and we figured out quickly that on Tuesday night when we sing at the devotionals, they always film the choir and put them on the big screen. There aren't that many sisters in the choir so you always see us on the screen, but we wanted more attention, so last week, I wore bright green and she wore bright purple. It worked like a charm - they totally focused in on us for a little while. We are MTC celebrities. Tonight is another devotional, but I think I'm going to wear gray. I don't want too much attention. :) We went to the TRC on Saturday morning and it was really fun. We convinced Trudy to get baptized! I'm so excited for her. She seemed pretty into it, but we're really trying to work on the questions that we can ask to get people more involved in the lesson. Sometimes, our teachers get other missionaries who've been here longer to come and do a demonstration for us and I always feel really bad because it's so boring and we almost fall asleep every time. I don't want to teach so that people fall asleep. I could always throw out one of my weird voices or something to wake them up, but I haven't been able to master my voices in Spanish yet. My district loves this one voice that I do sometimes (that I think I got from Luke and Cory and Kylie always do it - by the way, where is Cory? She hasn't written me yet and I miss her!). They call it the "grandma voice" and they ask me to do it all the time. Well, I love being at the MTC. I love wearing my tag and being called "hermana." It's really great and so fun and I'm learning a lot and hopefully, I'll know a little bit about how to be a missionary by the time I leave here. I love you so much and I'm grateful that I have a solid family supporting me at home. LOVE YOU!
P.S. I haven't gained weight yet, but I was weighing myself the other day and Elder Shawhan came around the corner as I stepped on the scale and said," FOUR HUNDRED POUNDS!" What a punk. Also, I'm addicted to sour patch kids. I crave them all the time. I think I'm going to try out the PMG method of overcoming addictions to see if it really works. :)